I was the ideal child. Straight A’s, cheerleader, basically everything parents would ever dream of having. I never got in trouble and spent my free time helping out with church activities. My parents are Christians and spend a lot of time at church. I didn’t do bad things never had, never thought I would. I was the most popular girl in school, friendly to all. Everyone loved me, I was there queen.
It was a Thursday when I heard about Derek House’s party. My friends had begged me to go until I finally caved. Saturday night finally rolled around. I was dressed and ready to go when my friends pulled. I was very nerves, this was my first party. We walked in to the house and the stench of sweat and booze smacked me in the face. I remember thinking that maybe this wasn’t the best idea in the world. We had made our way to the living room and were sitting on the couch when I noticed something coming my way. Someone passed me a rolled up paper that was smoking on one end. I didn’t know what to do so I passed it on when my friend told me to try it; it would relax me. I didn’t understand what it really was I had never tried anything drug related except for the average everyday sick pill. I remember hesitating but then thinking why not? What bad could this possibly do? It was only this one time right? Wrong.
That was the moment my life had changed. Even though I didn’t know it yet my life would never be that same because of that one brief decision. Soon after I became popular for a whole new set of reasons I was known as the party girl, the one who everyone wanted to hang out with. I could feel myself sinking but just didn’t care. My parents didn’t notice they pushed it aside like it didn’t even exist. They just couldn’t imagine anything but the perfect child they had created. Slowly I started to just not care about anyone or anything. I got into the harder drugs that only a short while ago I had no idea about now I was there best friend. Everyone who was around me started to come down with me. My life was unraveling right before my eyes yet I was clueless to see. Months started to fly by without me knowing. Some tried to stop me but it was useless I was on a runaway train that did not look like slowing down any time soon. My best friend, Tiffany, had been there through it all and I had slowly got her hooked to the party life too. We both became inseparable from each other never leaving each other’s side.
It was a Saturday night and Tiffany and I had been making our usual rounds at all different types of parties trying to find the best one. I remember we finally decided to stay at a guy’s party that they really didn’t even know. I plopped down on the couch looking for what everyone had been sniffing when I noticed that tiffany was not by me. Not thinking anything of it I quickly started to talk to everyone at the party thinking she would return in a few minutes. Well minutes turned to an hour with still no word from her. By this time I was completely gone from the world, I was in a alternate universe were everything felt and tasted good. I was too preoccupied with myself to notice that Tiffany had been gone for far too long. I remember laying there when a crowd started to form in the hallway my curiosity picked so I lazily got up and worked my way over to the crowd. When I got over I noticed them all huddled around someone not knowing who it was I pushed my way through the crowd until I finally made it to the front. There in front of my eyes was Tiffany on the bathroom ground pale as a ghost and staring at me with unmoved eyes. At first I thought it was a joke that someone had put her up to scaring me so I went up to her and lightly kicked her telling her that it wasn’t funny and to stop acting like an idiot. When she didn’t move I started to become impatient yelling at her telling her that the joke wasn’t funny anymore. Still no movement came from her; I dropped to my knees and felt for a pulse at her neck. There was none.
The next things happened in a blur. There was yelling and sirens all mixed together in one loud nightmare. It seemed in no time at all I found myself in a police station being questioned by a man in blue. He kept asking me what happened, but I honestly didn’t know. I told him how I had been sitting on the couch in the front room and didn’t realize her absence till it was too late. He looked at me as if were disappointed in me for not telling him anymore. I still hadn’t cried that whole night, not until I had finally reached my pillow did the impact of her death hit me. The grief flooded me like the ocean I tried to swim my way to the top but couldn’t seem to swim fast or hard enough. Some would think that the death of a close friend would make me want to stop my horrible habits since she had died from over dosing, but they were wrong it only made me want it more.
I began to go into the hard core drugs like crank, cocaine, and acid. My favorite though was crank. I felt it gave me an edge. Every time I was on it I felt invincible, like no one could come close to me because I was superior to them in every way shape and form. My parents decided to finally take action and put me in a rehab treatment center. What they didn’t know was that for that month I was there I was just waiting to get out so I could get back to my life, back to the drugs. I don’t think my parents could come to grasps with what there perfect daughter had become. They had always expected me to sail through high school with perfect grades then go to an amazing collage that costs thousands a month but they would have been happy to pay because their daughter would have been making something of herself. Maybe that’s why I had first gone to that party that ruined everything. I just wanted to be something other than their perfect daughter
It had been a month since I had gotten out of rehab and I was on a crazy high when my friends heard of another party in Westchester, a city not too far from where I lived. I immediately knew I wanted to go so I jumped in my car and took off. I must have been going 90 down the highway when I began to get really tired. I knew my high was fading and I needed a hit fast or I was going to fall asleep on the road. I was fumbling in my purse when out of nowhere a deer dashed across the road. Instead of slamming on my breaks which Is what anyone would have done I swerved out of the way just missing the deer but not the highway wall. I slammed into it and started to roll down the embankment. As my body was tumbling down with my car I suddenly wondered where it went wrong. Why had my life become this? Why didn’t I stop myself while I still had time? It’s my own fault this happened if I hadn’t been stupid and listened to my parents I would not be in this situation, but then again my parents should have seen me drowning from the beginning and saved me instead of ignoring me. As I make my very last roll down I realize that I don’t want to die but I already know I am since no one could possibly survive such a crash. My car slammed into a tree and then everything went black.
Right now I’m standing at my own funeral watching them lower my casket in the ground. Tiffany is next to me and holding my hand. Its surreal seeing someone put your lifeless body into the ground. I look over to see my mom screaming in agony as her one baby has finally left her. My dad is motionless just standing there with no emotions playing on his face. I regret disappointing them my goal was to never let them down but in the end I was just being selfish and didn’t really give a damn what they thought of me. Of cores now I do in the afterlife with my brain clear and focused. When the casket is all the way down into its grave I know its time to leave. Tiffany gives my hand a tight squeeze and we walk together into the light that awaits us. I look back one last time at my parents then my whole family that showed up. Funny none of my drug buddies decided to come. I take one last look at my old life then finally walk with Tiffany into my new one.
